Jakob Steinhardt (Jacob and Esau, 1950)
By Robert Craig
In the past two Third Saturday Healing Services we have looked at family dysfunctions from past generations as well as their impact on the here-and-now. Next Saturday we will be “Looking Forward” toward functioning as an optimal family.
As I contemplated writing something to tease you all to come to the healing service I was reminded how strongly our journey through Lent’s 40 days of reflection and penance might impact us and our families. In verse 3 of our Psalm for last Sunday (51), King David acknowledges: “For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me.” How many of us can say the same thing? He confesses and seeks God’s forgiveness, which we know was granted.
Through the Cross of Christ we have a much clearer and surer path: “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us of all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9 ESV emphasis added.
What are the roadblocks preventing me/you/us from becoming that optimal family? To me family goes beyond our flesh and blood kin, but includes our family in Christ and beyond. What sins, resentments, hurts, unforgivenesses….are binding us and retarding our growth, not only as a physical family but also the mystical family of God? These are tough questions that we frequently do not want addressed, for whatever reason.
Reflecting on the dysfuntionality of my birth family opened my eyes to many issues that plagued my youth and developed into extreme bitterness and resentment, which I carried into adult life, and I am certain impacted my wife and children. But thanks be to God, in his mercy he has shown me those areas and has guided me along a path of deliverance.
My birth family dysfunction was not overt, no abuse, no addictions, a relatively stable platform to grow and develop on. The most important absence was Jesus Christ. My mother was a bitter, lapsed Roman Catholic and my father a “lapsed” Unitarian (if in fact there is such a thing). Though their relationship was loving it was also emotionally cold. I don’t ever remember them saying “I love you” to each other nor do I think my brother and I ever heard the same directed to us. The only time I ever saw my father cry was at my mother’s funeral. I am not sure those were tears of grief or the realization of the inadequacies in their relationship.
Why did I bore you with these details? These and other issues, when they were finally recognized had to be dealt with. Bitterness, etc., had to be confessed and forgiveness toward my parents was in order. This brings me to another important aspect of Lent, becoming a penitent and making a sacramental confession. There is something so freeing when the priest says, “…I absolve you from all your sins:…”
Join us on Saturday, March 18th at 5 pm and look ahead to becoming an optimal family, seek prayer for healing, no matter the issue, and make your confession to a priest.
If you are interested in training to be part of the Healing Ministry team, or want to find out more, please contact Marian Vance, c[email protected], or Fr. Ray, [email protected].
Christ the Redeemer Anglican Church © 2016
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